Shelly R. Wilson

Empowering Acts of Self-Love

I recently spoke at Unity of Fayetteville on the topic of “The Empowering Act of Self-Love.” Many individuals find it easy to love others and to express that love, but find it challenging or uncomfortable to feel that same love for themselves.

In his book, Whatever Arises, Love That, Matt Kahn refers to “the new paradigm of spirituality as a love revolution that begins with you.”

You are a drop in the ocean of all. How you feel and what you do contributes to that metaphorical ocean of oneness. It is absolutely essential that you honor yourself and your emotions – the perceived “good, bad and ugly.” Matt states, “When you remember that whatever you are feeling is healing, you can rejoice in the number of times per day you are working in collaboration with the Universe to uplift the world.”

In addition to honoring what you are feeling, making conscious and empowered choices is necessary for your physical health and mental/emotional well-being. In Whatever Arises, Love That, Matt encourages us, “Instead of imagining how choices are ways to control outcomes or manipulate reality, you see each choice from a higher perspective. Each of your choices correlates to a vibrational frequency. Choices aligned with a high vibration often bring excitement, ease and relaxation into your body. The choices reflecting low vibration feel contracted, heavy and fill you with doubt, shame, guilt, worry or resentment.”

In essence, he is reminding each of us to tap into what feels right to us energetically as well as on a physical level, too. Are you residing and viewing the experience from a place of love (heart chakra) or fear (root chakra)?

The willingness to allow your choices to come from a place of love no matter the outcomes or circumstances at hand is what Matt refers to as the heart of surrender. He conveys, “In the heart of surrender, your highest aspiration is to fulfill each goal in the most loving possible way. If there is an imbalance, it will be healed with love. If there is confusion, it will be clarified with love. If there is anything to choose, it will be chosen by love. If there is anything to awaken, it will be awakened by love.”

Matt reminds us that, “As your heart expands, you no longer overlook opportunities to provide yourself with the same kindness and care that so many in your life are blessed to receive. One loving embrace at a time, you become a living testimony of just how powerful, aligned, inspired, and happy you have always been destined to be.”

Therefore, allow yourself the opportunity to partake in these acts of self-love and feel empowered to do so.

Self-love is…

Choosing yourself and taking responsibility for all of your choices and experiences.

Establishing personal boundaries and knowing what is right for you, including saying “no” when you mean no rather than saying yes to appease others.

Saying what you mean to say and also communicating your needs and desires to yourself and to others. Taking care of your physical health by providing your body with the nurturing, necessary foods, rest, exercise, and comfort it needs to the best of your ability.

Honoring your emotions and mental health, while recognizing certain people, places or things may not be right for you or resonate with you.

Wearing clothes that make you feel good rather than keeping up with the current styles.

Taking time to do whatever you love, just to play, without worrying about wasting time.

Seeing yourself as a beautiful, unique and miraculous creation without feeling guilty, arrogant or entitled to do so.

Not rehashing your self-perceived mistakes and instead choosing to see them as opportunities for learning and growth.

Spending some quality, connected time with yourself, which may include pampering, instead of partaking in activities to just occupy your time.

Trusting the individualized path that your soul is on without comparing your journey to others and making a genuine effort to become a conscious co-creator of your destiny.

Listening to your heart/spirit and following what your gut/intuition says instead of living solely in your head/ego. Move into the flow of allowance without feeling the need to analyze or attempt to control everything.

Knowing how you’re spending your emotional, mental, financial, and physical energy, and recognizing whether these activities bring back joy, connection, nurturing, rest, and creativity to your life.